A classic tale where two suicidal people meet, fall in love, and try to keep each other from killing themselves, but, like, in a funny way.
Echo: “Well-adjusted considering what you’ve been through.” That’s what my therapist likes to tell me.
If well-adjusted means following dangerous people to secluded areas in the hopes they’ll off me, then yes. I am the picture of mental health.
What’s a boy to do when his would-be murderer gets murdered? Definitely not stalk the murderer. Or openly set up camp on his front lawn.
Or tell him that, since he foiled a perfectly good suicide, he now owes me a murder. Vale: “Dangerous sociopath. Kill on sight.” That’s what my former captors like to say. They’re not wrong.
Killing just feels so good, but science feels even better, and sleep is a gift from the gods, so murder usually takes a backseat to them.
So what am I supposed to do when I eat the wrong person and his victim comes after me, demanding I finish the job? Definitely not break into his house and sleep in his bed when he’s not around.
Or order a shipment of groceries to him every week to make sure he eats properly. Or tell him that I plan on spending the rest of his life following him around to keep him safe.
