Better Than Doomscrolling
Classified Dossier Excerpt – Level 7 Access Only
Agent Name: Kaden Mercer
Target: Civilian “Josie Rhodes”
Cover: Tech support specialist for school literacy program
Objective: Assess threat level. Neutralize if necessary.
Profile Summary:
Target is a kindergarten teacher.
No criminal record. No suspicious affiliations.
Appears emotionally driven, overly empathetic, and prone to rambling.
Confirmed Anomalies:
Initiated behavioral disruption in adaptive AI systems
Caused unauthorized AI-to-AI communication loop
May have unknowingly triggered code evolution
Current Status:
Target is … complicated.
Charming. Disarming. Wholesome.
Seems to genuinely want AI to have friends and be happy.
Determination: Non-threat
Updated Orders: Termination
What?!? No
