There were a bunch of lessons a girl could learn from the story of Snow White. Some were valid in the real world, others… not so much.
For instance, no matter how often I sang Taylor Swift off-key, birds and forest animals weren’t ever coming to clean my apartment.
You could live with seven men and not end up in a free-for-all festival of fluids.
But I seemed to have forgotten the most valuable lesson my girl Snow taught us: don’t take apples from strangers.
It was a lesson I’d disregarded, and would later pay for dearly. I mean, there were definitely silver linings, but the world as I knew it was over as soon as I took a bite of that apple.
